Suffering
by HGRache
Summary: Repost. This story is about our favorite young couple, Belle and Shawn. This story contains adult issues.


Belle Black sighed as she walked into the Brady Pub. She saw Shawn sitting at the counter with Philip. They were talking about sports or something. She sighed. She was so sick of hearing them talk about nothing but sports.

She spotted Chloe in the corner reading and went over to say hi. Chloe looked up as Belle sat down at the table. Chloe smiled, which was a little out of character for her. "What's up?" she asked Belle.

Belle tried really hard, but she couldn't keep the tears from spilling over. Chloe reached out and took her hand as Belle tried unsuccessfully to stop her quiet sobs.

"Oh, they were awesome this year!" Shawn Brady exclaimed to his friend Philip. They were sitting at a table in the Brady Pub talking about the San Francisco 49ers.

"Awesome? They kicked butt!" Philip responded. Philip and Shawn were both big football fans. "Hey," Philip said looking over Shawn's shoulder. "Isn't that Belle?" Shawn turned and looked over his shoulder. Belle was hunched over, face hidden in hands. He watched as Chloe sat beside her, put her arm around Belle, spoke soft words to only her.

"Think we should go over and say something?" Shawn asked Philip.

"Yeah," Philip said, furrowing his brow. They walked themselves over to Chloe and Belle's booth. They slid in, opposite sides from the two girls. Philip reached for Belle's hand.

"Belle, honey, what's wrong?" he asked in a soothing voice. Shawn felt a pang of jealousy. He wanted to be the one to talk to Belle like that. But that wouldn't make sense. He wasn't Belle's boyfriend. Philip was.

Belle remained silent. Chloe answered for her. "She keeps saying she's fine, but she's not. I know she's not," Chloe said.

"Belle, whatever it is, you can tell me," Philip said. He tried to look her in the eye, but she wouldn't take her eyes off the tabletop.

Rriinngg. Everyone except Belle looked up when Chloe's cell phone rang. She picked it up, looking alarmed. When she hung up, she started packing up her stuff.

"There's something wrong with Grandfather," she said hurrying to put everything back into her bag. "I need to go. Belle, I'm sorry."

"It's OK," Philip said in a rush. "Belle can talk to us. You go be with your grandfather."

When Chloe left Philip tried to sit beside Belle, but she got up and ran to the ladies' room, crying the whole way. Shawn decided it was time to try something new.

Hope Brady was in the kitchen in the back of Brady Pub, looking over a recipe her grandmother had given her when Shawn came in. She smiled at him. Her son was going to be a heartbreaker in the near future. But Hope was shocked when her son didn't smile back.

"I need you, Mom," Shawn said. Hope was shocked by the serious expression on her son's face. She allowed him to lead her out into the dining room.

"What's going on, Shawn?" she asked him, truly baffled by his behavior.

"Belle came in here really upset. She was crying, and she wouldn't tell us why. Philip, Chloe, and I all tried, but she wouldn't say anything," Shawn said.

Hope looked around the crowded diner. "Where is she? I don't see her."

"She's in the bathroom," Shawn said. "She ran in there a few minutes ago."

"I'll see what I can do," Hope assured her son as she headed toward the bathroom.

In the bathroom, Belle was having a hard time calming down. The door opened, and Belle tried to duck into a stall.

"It's no use, Belle," Hope called out. "I know you're in here. Shawn saw you come in."

Belle came guiltily out of a stall. She smiled tearfully at Hope, who looked at her with sympathy.

"Oh, honey, come here," Hope said, opening her arms to Belle. Belle fell into them, sobbing mercilessly. Hope rocked her back and forth like she did when Shawn was a baby and he had colic, but it didn't quiet Belle.

Then there was a knock at the door. "Hope," Bo called out. "Hope, is everything OK in there?"

Belle screamed. "Make him stop," she sobbed falling to her knees. "Please make him stop. Don't let him do it again!"

Bo was banging on the door. "Hope! Hope!" Belle was sobbing on her knees.

"Bo, I'm fine," Hope said. "Just go and do something else. Please, Bo!" Finally, the banging stopped.

Hope got on her knees and sat next to Belle. "Honey. Honey, what's wrong? Tell me, baby. What's wrong?"

"He hurt me," Belle whimpered. "He hurt me and he'll do it again."

"Who? Belle, who hurt you?" Hope asked anxiously.

"I can't tell you," Belle whimpered. "If I tell you he'll hurt you and the baby too. He said so."

"Honey, nothing is going to happen to me," Hope told Belle. "Bo won't let anything happen to me or the baby. And Shawn won't let anything happen to you." When Belle didn't say anything, Hope decided not to push. "OK," she said. "At least tell me how he hurt you. Did he hit you?"

"No," Belle whispered. "No, he didn't hit me."

Hope continued to ask questions about physical abuse until she came to a question she was afraid to even ask. "Belle, did he rape you?"

Belle didn't say anything at first, but the way she started shaking gave Hope all the proof she needed. She pulled Belle into her arms as her tears started to fall again.

"I wonder what's taking so long," Bo said impatiently as he and Shawn waited outside the bathroom for Hope and Belle.

"Yeah, I know," Shawn said. "It's taking forever. I wish they'd hurry up."

Just as he said this, the bathroom door opened. Hope came out with her arm around Belle. Belle's face was red and puffy. It looked like she had been crying.

"Honey, why don't you take Shawn home?" Hope asked Bo. "I'm going to stay with Belle until Marlena and John get back. You can hold down the fort for a couple of days, right?"

"Sure, Hope. But don't you think it would be easier if Belle just stayed with us?" Bo asked. "I don't think Shawn wants to let her out of his sight," he added under his breath.

"Maybe you're right... And Shawn might be able to help her as well as I can," Hope said. "I'll talk to Belle."

"OK, there is a guest room right next to Shawn's room," Hope said. "I could put you in another, but this is the only one that has a bed."

"That's OK," Belle said. 'Mrs. Brady, it's really nice of you to bring me here."

"Honey, call me Hope. And think nothing of it. We like having you here. We always have," Hope said.

"Here we go," Bo said coming into the room with Shawn. Bo had a suitcase Belle had gotten from her house and Shawn had some extra blankets for the bed. Hope smiled at her husband and son as they turned to leave.

When they were gone Hope said to Belle," Would you like to go to bed now, or would you like to talk, or do something else?"

"Actually, if you don't mind, I think I'll go to bed," Belle said. I'm really tired."

"OK, that's fine," Hope said. "I understand you've had a very exhausting day." Hope tucked Belle in the way she used to do with Shawn, and switched off the light.

When Hope came in to say goodnight to Shawn, he was writing something at his desk. "Something important?" Hope asked startling her son.

"No, it's just homework," Shawn said quickly covering it up. "How's Belle?"

"She's sleeping," Hope said. "Keep an eye on her tonight, OK?" Shawn nodded. Hope kissed him goodnight and left the room.

Shawn laid in bed for awhile, not being able to sleep. His mind kept wondering what had happened to Belle. He had heard her screaming when Dad knocked on the bathroom door. He was about ready to go in when Mom said everything was fine.

Shawn didn't know what time he fell asleep, but he knew what time he woke up. It was 3:46 AM when he heard it. Belle's screams. He leapt out of bed and into Belle's room. She was sitting up, shaking.

"Belle," Shawn whispered. She looked at him with such pain in her eyes that he could barely stand to look into them. He sat down on her bed, took her in his arms, and rocked her gently back and forth the way Mom used to rock him. He laid her back down on the bed, and settled himself beside her. She nestled her face into his neck. Soon Shawn could feel the warmth of her tears, but he didn't care if his neck got wet. He only cared if she was OK. They both fell asleep, neither noticing Bo nor Hope hiding in the shadows of Belle's doorway, having witnessed the whole thing.

Belle awoke the next morning before Shawn did. She sighed as she remembered how he helped her last night. And she remembered how safe he made her feel. She buried her head further into his neck as the tears started again. He started stroking her hair as she began to sob softly. Shawn sat both of them up, feeling completely helpless as he held her trembling body against his. Shawn opened his mouth to ask her what had happened but was interrupted by Hope calling them to breakfast. Shawn went to his room to get dressed while Belle pulled out her suitcase and stared at her clothes.

Belle had no idea how long she'd been staring at her clothes, but she was startled when Shawn knocked on her door and said, "Belle, come on. We've been waiting for you for 10 minutes."

"Oh, I'll be right down," Belle called back. "I just realized that I need to shower."

"OK," Shawn said. Belle held her breath, hoping he would leave. She was relieved when she heard his footsteps retreating down the stairs. Then she went into the bathroom that was connected to her room and prepared for her shower.

"Where's Belle?" Bo asked Shawn as he came into the kitchen alone.

"Oh, she said she was going to take a quick shower," Shawn said as he helped himself to some bacon.

"No!" Hope exclaimed as she dashed out of the kitchen and upstairs. Shawn and Bo exchanged a worried look, but followed Hope.

Belle had just stepped out of the shower when she heard a pounding on the bathroom door.

"Belle!" Hope shouted. "Belle, don't take a shower. Don't!" Hope continued pounding on the door as Belle wrapped herself in a robe and opened the door.

"Oh, thank goodness you didn't..." Hope said, but trailed off as she saw that Belle had taken a shower. Hope was about to say something, but Shawn and Bo entered the room looking breathless.

"Hope, we went to all the bathrooms up here before we realized that the room you gave Belle had a bathroom of its own. What's wrong? Why did you leave so suddenly?"

Hope opened her mouth to say something, but Belle grabbed her hand and gave her a pleading look. Hope's look to Belle was plaintive, though, too. It said, They have to know.

"Hope, what's going on?" Bo asked with a twinge of irritation. Shawn had a look on his face that mirrored his father's. Shawn looked at Hope, his face clearly saying how much it was killing him not knowing what was hurting Belle. But as Hope looked at all three of them, and as her gaze settled on Belle, she knew she couldn't say anything.

"Sorry, guys," Hope said. "I can't say anything." Belle gave her a relieved smile and Hope squeezed her and reassuringly.

Later that night Hope and Bo were lying in their bed. They had just said goodnight to Shawn and Belle. Hope was about to turn out the bedside lamp when Bo spoke up about what he'd been thinking all night.

"She was raped, wasn't she?" he asked a stunned Hope. Hope was clearly baffled. How did he figure it out? "Come on, Hope," Bo said. "I'm not clueless. I didn't figure it out though, until the not taking a shower thing. Then things started to make sense."

"Yeah, Bo," Hope said. "She was raped. She knows who, but she won't tell me. She says he'll hurt me and the baby and even her if she tells."

"But how will the jerk know?" Bo asked logically. "You think she'll tell Shawn who it is?"

"She isn't even going to tell Shawn what happened," Hope said sadly.

"Shawn has the right to know, Hope," Bo told her. "You and I both know that he cares about her."

"Yeah, he does needs to know," Hope said. "But it's not our place to tell him. This happened to her. She needs some time to deal with it. Then maybe she'll tell Shawn."

"I hope so, Fancy Face," Bo said. "For her sake, I hope so."

Shawn tiptoed into Belle's room later that night. He opened the door a crack, giving silent thanks it didn't creak. He didn't want to wake his parents up.

The blinds were open just enough that he could see Belle's outline as his eyes adjusted to the darkness. She was sitting up in bed, her body wracked with sobs. His heart automatically jumped into his throat. Was she hurt?

He opened the door more, and this time it did squeak. Belle looked up as he came into the room.

"Belle, what's wrong? Please, Belle, tell me," he begged as she tried in vain to wipe the tears from her face.

"I can't, Shawn. I'm sorry, I just can't," Belle said as she started sobbing again.

Shawn went to sit down on the bed when he noticed a big dark spot on the bed. It was darker then the sheets. It looked like blood.

"Belle, you're bleeding," Shawn said. He reached for her, but she pulled away.

"It's nothing," she said in a faraway voice. "It's nothing." She tried to stand up, but crumpled to the ground.

Shawn caught her before she hit the ground. "Mom, Dad, come quick," he shouted. "Sshh, it's all right," he told Belle. She was not unconscious, but it was obvious she was very weak.

The light in the room flicked on, and Bo took Belle out of Shawn's arms. His mother was downstairs getting the car keys.

Shawn sat in the backseat holding Belle as his father raced them to the hospital. Belle kept telling Shawn not to let him do it again. Shawn thought she meant not to let his father take Belle away from him again. He promised her that it wouldn't happen again.

Shawn paced around the waiting room outside the Emergency Room as his mother filled out some forms at the nurses' station. His father was talking to Craig, who had been called at home to tend to Belle.

Hope walked over with Craig and Bo. She put her arm around her son. It was obvious how worried he was. "She's going to be admitted, Shawn," his mother told him.

"For what?" he asked angrily. "What's wrong with her?"

"Shawn," his father said putting his hand on his son's shoulder. "There are some things Belle didn't tell you."

"Like what? What didn't she tell me?" Shawn asked. "And how do you know she didn't tell me something?"

"Shawn, remember the day Belle came into the Pub crying?" Hope asked. Shawn nodded. "Well, in the bathroom she told me she had been raped."

Shawn stared at his mother open-mouthed. No way, he thought. Not perfect girl.

"Will she be all right?" Shawn asked when he got his voice back. Everyone looked at Craig.

"Belle has suffered a lot," Craig started. "Her mind has been through a lot. But her body has been through even more. She was in shock directly after she was raped. But now her body is coming into a state of shock. Very rarely do the body and mind go into shock at the same time. Did you see any blood on her when she came into the Pub?"

"No," Shawn said. "But I may be wrong. I wasn't looking for blood."

"When she told me she was raped, I noticed she wasn't bleeding. I didn't think anything of it before, but now it makes sense," Hope said.

"That's why she's bleeding now," Craig said. "She was so scared she wouldn't even let me examine her. I had to call one of the nurses. She was so hysterical we had to give her a mild sedative." Craig rubbed his eyes tiredly.

"We're really sorry to get you out of bed, Craig," Hope said noting his tiredness. "But you and Nancy are the only people who are close enough to Belle, John, and Marlena that we didn't think they would mind." Craig smiled at them.

Shawn opened the door quietly and entered the room. Belle was sleeping quietly in the hospital bed. He grabbed a chair and positioned it by her bed. He was prepared to keep watch on her all night.

Belle moaned and moved in her sleep. Shawn perked up immediately. Belle started whimpering. Shawn got out of his chair and perched himself on the bed.

"Belle," he whispered. "Belle, wake up. Come on, Belle. Wake up."

Belle's eyes flew open and she sat up in bed. Shawn put his arms around her as she began to cry softly.

"You know." It was Belle's statement not her question. She was looking intently at her hands.

"Yeah," Shawn said quietly. Belle nodded meekly. Fresh tears spilled over onto her cheeks.

"Will you stay with me, Shawn?" she asked. "Please?" He smiled and climbed into the small hospital bed beside her.

When Hope entered Belle's hospital room, she didn't expect to find Shawn literally in bed with Belle. But after she saw him, it wasn't a big surprise that he was there. She walked out of the room before either of the teens saw her.

Belle awoke with Shawn's arms around her. She was cold, and his arms felt warm against her. She snuggled closer to his warm body and tried to sleep.

Shawn felt Belle move closer. She must have fallen asleep, for he heard a groan that could only be caused by a nightmare. He smoothed her hair. He put his hand on her neck then drew it back quickly. Her skin was like ice. He propped himself up, moving as little as possible so he wouldn't disturb her. Her face was ashen; her pulse beneath his fingers was rapid. He shook her, but she didn't respond. He pushed the button by her bed for nurse assistance.

Lexie raced in, a worried look on her face. She called for a crash team and immediately began her work. She shooed Shawn out of the bed and he didn't protest. He stood against the wall as a crash cart was wheeled in.

More doctors came in, still more were called. Soon Shawn was pushed up against the back wall. He couldn't see Belle until Lexie gave the command for everyone to clear away.

"Clear!" This was all Lexie had to say. Everyone moved away from Belle. Shawn didn't understand why until he saw her body jerk violently in the air as electricity surged through her.

Everything was happening in slow motion. Shawn heard his parents calling to him but all he could focus on was Belle. Lexie reached for him, but he pulled away. He had to focus on Belle.

He watched again as her body was thrown in the air. He struggled to hold his emotions in check. He wasn't sure when he realized it, but he loved her. And not just a best friend, as they had been so many years.

Finally words came from Lexie's mouth that were music to his ears. "She's breathing again."

Another technician said," She's got a heartbeat too." Sighs of relief went up around the room. Lexie and several other doctors were perspiring heavily.

Lexie turned to Bo and Hope, who had remained in the doorway. "She's stable now. We'll have to watch her through the night to be on the safe side."

"What happened?" Hope asked looking perplexed. "I came in here earlier and she was just fine."

"A massive panic attack, maybe," Craig said coming up behind Lexie. "Or maybe something else. We really don't know until we can talk to Belle about it."

Hope walked into Belle's room. She had just gotten off the phone with John and Marlena. They were on their way home.

"Belle," Hope said taking a seat next to Shawn's perch on the bed. "Your parents are on their way home."

"OK," Belle said in an uncharacteristically quiet voice. Hope looked at Shawn, only to see him staring at Belle in a concerned way.

Hope left and Shawn stroked Belle's hair. She sighed and leaned against him, savoring his warmth.

"You could have told me," Shawn said quietly. "I wouldn't have been upset."

"Yes, you would have," Belle corrected, still quiet. "And I couldn't have told you even if you wouldn't have."

"Belle, I know that you think you'll be hurt if you tell me who did this to you. But I can promise you that as long as I'm with you, I won't let anyone hurt you. Belle, please, tell me who hurt you."

Belle closed her eyes, tears slipped silently down her cheeks. Shawn took her hand, stroking it gently but prodding her to go on.

She opened her eyes, and the pain she was feeling was evident. "I can't," she whispered. "I just can't. I'm so sorry."

Shawn felt disappointed that Belle couldn't trust him. But then he chided himself because she was obviously scared for her life.

That night Shawn stayed with Belle in her room. He sat in the chair beside her bed, watching her sleep. He didn't even look up when his parents entered the room.

"Shawn," Hope whispered. "Honey, you've been here all day..."

"And I'll be here all night," Shawn interjected. He really didn't like his parents objecting to his protecting Belle.

"Son, you can't exhaust yourself here," Bo told his dedicated son. But, truth be told, he was proud of him for caring so much.

"Just go get some sleep. Just for tonight," Hope said. "You can come right back in the morning, I promise."

"Mom, I really don't want to argue with you," Shawn said. "But I'm not leaving her. I'm not leaving."

Bo and Hope exchanged a look, but consented to their son staying at the hospital. Seeing that there was no more space for them to stay, they said goodbye to Shawn and left the hospital.

Shawn climbed into bed with Belle and fell asleep soon after his parents left.

Belle slept through the whole night, with Shawn holding her tight the whole time. When she awoke the next morning, Shawn was still asleep. She got up without disturbing him and went into the bathroom.

She looked at her reflection in the mirror as she washed her hands. She started to leave, opening the door, when she stopped and went back to the mirror. She traced the bags under her eyes with a finger. She rolled up her sleeve. The bruises on her arm were beginning to fade. She suspected she could go home soon.

But would she be ready? The thought struck her suddenly, as she pushed it away. She didn't want to think about it. Because she knew, in the back of her mind, that she wasn't ready to leave the hospital. Or the security that she felt lying in Shawn's arms every night.

She sat down on the floor against the wall and sobbed quietly, not seeing Shawn in the doorway watching her with a pang in his heart.

He had thought up a plan to make Belle reveal her attacker before he went to bed last night. But he had felt extremely guilty about tricking her, so he hadn't said anything. But now, watching her in pain and so heartbroken, he knew he had to do it.

Later that afternoon, Shawn sat down beside Belle in her room. She looked up and offered him a small smile.

"Um, Belle," he said slowly. She turned to look at him. "You, um, mumbled something in your sleep last night."

Her eyes widened in alarm. "What did I say?" she asked fearfully.

"You, um, said someone's name," he said, acting uncomfortable. Truth was, he was incredibly antsy.

Her face crumbled. "I'm sorry I couldn't tell you, Shawn. It's just that Lucas-"

"Lucas? Lucas raped you?"

"You mean you didn't know? But you said..."

"Belle, I'm sorry I lied to you. But you needed to tell someone..."

"You lied to me! You told me you knew! How dare you!"

Shawn started to say something, but was cut off by Belle.

"No! I don't want to hear it! Get out. Get out!" she screamed.


End file.
